On and on and on

As I drive through the city in a Paris taxi, I gaze out the window in awe of the graceful architecture, the almost regal apprearance of the buildings that have been here for centuries. And then I think about snippets of conversations about a world-wide economic crisis, and wonder how many of those crises have those buildings weathered....

Seems to me that the buildings represent something that it is a bit less evident in the US, simply because we are a relatively new land, with most of our country built in the last two hundred years or less. So we don't have the stately presence of history to remind us that life just keeps going on, and on, and on.

The buildings may have changed ownership over the years, but they are still here. The shops sell different merchandise, perhaps, but they keep inviting businesses to open them. There are many shops in Paris and Barcelona that have served customers for what seems forever, they are landmarks, fixtures of the urban landscape.

I find this very reassuring, calming even. It reminds me to not get too caught up in the fluctuations of the economy; instead to reflect on the resiliency of human beings.

It reminds me to appreciate the struggle of humans to find their order, their place in the world, the way to live with others and keep evolving. Being human isn't easy; it takes a lot of effort to live well and find the peace of mind to truly cooperate with others.

So I stand in awe of human beings as well as the structures they have built.... And yes, I know I'm one of them, and that makes me feel really good inside.

Friends Part II

So, continuing on my theme of friendship, what are friends actually for?

I think that they are especially valuable when they challenge us--to look at ourselves differently, to think about things differently, to get out of our own way. I recently had a dilemma about one of the people I work with. He has been in a difficult family situation, I've been watching from a distance, and it finally reached a point where it is jeopardizing our business.

What to do? Say something I think will help? Stay back and see what happens? Talk behind his back to others and share our opinions with each other but not tell him? I have done bits of the last two choices and found them to be unsatisfactory. They didn't help....

So after sleeping on it, I sat down and wrote him a long letter this morning. I told him what I thought, I made a few suggestions and pushed send. And I took a big risk!

I don't know what will come of it, but at least I did something, and even if he reacts negatively to what I wrote, I can at least look myself in the mirror and know I did what I believed was the right thing to do. Isn't that what friends are for?

What friends are for.....

After what seems like a race to the finish I finally boarded a plane to Paris on Monday for a long awaited trip to visit my dear friends there and spend time in my favorite city away from home (I do admit that I love Dallas, and so it still stands as my favorite city). And as much as I adore the architecture, the feel of the culture, the different way they do almost everything in Paris, seeing my friends is the real draw to being here.

Who would I be without my friends? They are my anchors in what would be a much different type of existence if I didn't have them. The are my teachers. They are my mirrors. They challenge and support me at the same time. They keep me humble and give me much needed wake-up calls.

The best thing about my friends is that when I don't know what to do, I know whom to ask--which is invaluable, as well as life-saving. Today I got a really strange email from a guy I dated for a few months and had sort of let drift away, and I was so surprised to get it, I had no idea what to do with it. So I forwarded it to my best friend and asked her what she would do. The answer was so ideal, I'm going to share it. She wrote:

"OK. Here's what I thought when I read the email. Uh. Not bad but not good either... a part of being open to meeting new people. Then I had this vision of swimming up-stream in lovely slow moving water and that email is just an autumn leaf floating by. I wouldn't answer it, I'd just notice it and let it float on by."

I can't imagine a better response, much less a more poetic one. Now that's what friends are for!

So here I am in Paris with friends I haven't seen for a year and it is if I saw them yesterday. We pick up in the middle of the last conversation and continue it. I see the baby I have known since before she was born and she runs to me with complete recognition! The bond between us is as strong as the one I have with her mother. The last time I was here she was 6 months old, so how can she remember me? My guess is that she just feels the love I have for her....

I walk arm in arm with a dear girl who has shared some of the most important passages of her life with me and I can't imagine who I would be if I didn't know her. Our contact between visits is fairly minimal, as we both have very busy lives. But the depth between us is unshakable.

And I talk into the night with another woman I have known for nine years who has taken longer to truly open up to me, but who I haved loved seeing blossom into her authentic self over those years. These are all unique friendships that each serve me in a unique way. And they are so much a part of the fabric of my being that I know they have influenced and changed me, as I have affected their lives. Thank God for them, and thank God I know this! Thank God for my friends!